Hi People!!!!!
How’s the holiday season treating you? It may seem like I’m skipping ahead yet again by talking about New Year’s resolutions before Christmas, but this will be my last newsletter of the year! I’m going to take the next couple of weeks off to relax for the holidays and get some exciting plans for this platform ready for the New Year. Plus, talking about my plans for 2021 in the 21st newsletter just felt too perfect.
Reflections on 2020 and Resolutions for 2021
If Kylie Jenner thought 2016 was “the year of just realizing stuff” I would LOVE to hear her profound reflections on 2020. This year felt like an awakening in so many ways. Though I graduated college in 2019, most of my friends didn’t finish until this year, allowing me extend my college mindset along with them and leading to a rather rude awakening when they all went home to learn on Zoom. I started a new job that taught me so much about what I do and don’t want in my career. I started this newsletter! Something I’ve wanted to do for practically my entire life but never made time for. I got a dog, which sounds simple enough but enriched my life and challenged me in ways I never expected. George Floyd was murdered, shining a bright, stark light on some of the darkest corners of American systems and exposing so many complacencies and ignorances within myself. And it pains me to admit that normally all of these things would happen in the whirlwind of life and I’d give each of them a few passing thoughts before rushing off to the next thing, but in the context of the global pandemic still raging on around us, I was forced to sit in stillness, absorbing each and every one. Some like a soft ray of light slowly opening my eyes to a new morning, some like a punch to the gut.
I could write entire essays about how each of these events impacted me, and I’ve considered doing so for each one as I contemplated what to write about in this newsletter week after week, but it always felt disingenuous because I’m still learning and growing from all of them. I do feel confident in one thing I’ve learned from the COVID context surrounding these events though, which is that I need to slow wayyyyyyyyyy down and be conscious of how I spend my time, energy, and money, the decisions I make, and the thoughts I usually try to run away from. The slow pace of 2020 and the lack of distraction forced me to face how quickly I move through life, usually acting out of habit instead of thinking about what I actually want and why I want it. Doing the easy thing instead of making the extra effort to prioritize my values. This lack of intention has led to years of procrastinating on my passions, money seeming to mysteriously vanish from my bank account, and hours spent staring at screens. While my own passiveness is only a tiny drop in the bucket, I can see why change happens so slowly (if at all) when millions of others probably approach life the same way I have for so long, allowing injustice in society and destruction to our planet. (I almost forgot that Australia was on fire all summer with everything else that’s happened since.)
This all sounds very doom and gloom, but reflecting on 2020 has made me feel energized and excited to go into 2021. Potentially my nerdiest personality trait (okay not my nerdiest, but it’s up there) is that I love New Year’s resolutions. I don’t think I’ve ever stuck to one in my entire life, but I get a ridiculous rush from meticulously planning out all the ways I’m going to be better and do more in the following year. But this year is going to be different!!!!!!! Instead of a long list of vague resolutions like “eat healthier” and “be nicer” that I’m sure you’d find in my journals from high school, I’m setting one measurable goal this year, and I’m telling you all about it to hold me accountable. My official, one and only New Year’s resolution for 2021 is...... *****drumroll please*****
I WILL BUY NO MORE THAN ONE (1) NEW FASHION OR HOME DECOR ITEM PER MONTH. EVERYTHING ELSE MUST BE SECOND HAND OR MADE FROM DEAD STOCK / UPCYCLED MATERIAL.
That was exhilarating, wasn’t it?!?!
The idea behind this resolution is that it will force me to slow down and take a deep breath to carefully consider at least one type of decision in my life. (My secret hope is that it will affect the other decisions too, but I’m trying not to demand too much of myself.) This might sound crazy depending on your spending habits, but considering second-hand items are usually less expensive and I typically make many more than one new purchase per month, I think this will also help me get my finances a little bit under control. It will make me more creative in my shopping and outfitting process which is always a goal, and of course it promotes the sustainability so badly needed in the fashion industry.
I did consider not even allowing myself one new item per month, as I firmly believe that anything I want can be found secondhand, and at the end of the day, I don’t need any more stuff in my apartment. However, I’ve always found that being too strict with myself is directly linked to failure. I’d also be missing the opportunity to support small and/or Black-owned and/or female-owned businesses that produce new goods, so those will be taking priority in my monthly purchases. There’s a big part of myself that always feels like I’m not doing enough, that this one resolution isn’t enough to fix myself or society or the planet, but I’m learning to fight those thoughts. The other half of my brain knows that trying to do it all is exactly what keeps me from doing anything. And who does that help? My new theory is that we should all focus on what we’re good at and passionate about to create change within ourselves and the world, at least as a start. Maybe for other people that’s being a lawyer or doing math or baking cakes, but I am good at shopping, so that is what I will do.
Second-Hand Gift Ideas
A vintage Japanese mug for the person whose trip to Tokyo got canceled because of Corona.
A Ralph Lauren cable-knit sweater for your WASPiest friend.
A Goodie Bag by Sifted made of vintage quilts for the person who does not understand the micro bag trend.
Teeny tiny ‘90s shades for the Bella Hadid fan girl.
Vintage, gold Prada kitten heels for the person who is all about the designer name.
A seashell scarf for your grandmother with the seahorse tattoo. (Just me?)
Recs of the week
Try the Legally Addictive cracker cookies. The name doesn’t lie: I am, in fact, addicted.
Subscribe to Cat Cohen’s Sexy Little Email. It’s wonderful and weird, and I’m not sure how else to describe it.
Shop the “For Sale” highlight on my Instagram if you missed my closet sale on Sunday. Second hand! Sustainable! A cleaned out apartment for me!
Scream your New Year’s resolution at me in the comments! We can be accountability buddies!!! (Can you tell my childhood made me crave rules and structure?! On second thought, maybe it wasn’t my childhood. Maybe it’s just me.)
Okay friends! That’s all I’ve got for 2020! Thank you for being on this fun little journey with me. It’s only going to get better from here!!! I’ll still be available via email and DM and such if you want to chat or submit questions for future newsletters, but if not, I’ll see you next year!
Cheers,
Maddy